Growing up, I didn’t have a really have an idea of what a functional relationship was. I made bad decision after bad decision when it came to men, and there was no one there to guide me. I realize there are women out there who don’t get along with their mother-in-law, but fortunately that is not the case for me. Having her in my life has helped me to grow and learn. These are some lessons I have learned from my mother-in-law, and why they are important.
Fix what is broken
Over the last four years I have observed my in-laws and the way they interact with one another. It is pretty obvious when things are strained, and when things are good, they are really good. I watched as a dark cloud moved over them a few months ago and turned them both into different people. My mother-in-law worked hard at getting them back to the place they are now, and I admire her for it. Every marriage has issues. The important thing is how you deal with them. If you are willing to throw something away simply because it is not working at the highest functioning level, it wasn’t that special to you in the first place. Whenever I fight with my husband, I try to remember that everything is fixable in one way or another.
Don’t sweat the little things
A few months ago, we moved in with my in-laws. It was a mutually beneficial agreement, especially with the economy the way it is. About two weeks after we got married, I got a phone call that changed the lives of everyone in our immediate family. My in-laws were in a horrific motorcycle accident. In that moment, things changed. I no longer was angry about why my husband was late from work, or why he left his dirty socks on our bedroom floor when the hamper was only two feet away. In fact, I actually apologized for being so harsh. You never know how much time you have with the person you love, and you need to make the best of it. Don’t get crazy about the little things. “Laugh often and love hard” is something my mother-in-law constantly says, and I couldn’t agree more.
Enjoy your husband
The last several months have flown by. My husband and I got married in August, and have spent a total of six hours alone since then. After being faced with nearly losing my in-laws, I have realized that spending time with him is a priority. Even after their accident, they still go out on “dates” and spend time with one another. In fact, the entire ordeal has brought them back to a place they had not been in a very long time. They are enjoying one another again, and it definitely makes a difference on how they interact with each other.
The time spent with my in-laws has helped me to take a better look at my own relationship. My mother-in-law is a remarkable lady and has taught me valuable lessons in love and life. I only hope that one day my husband and I will have half the love my in-laws share as a couple.
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