We should have seen it coming- but we didn’t. The United Kingdom is taking over America. All of our major Super Heroes are British: Batman, Spiderman, and yes even Superman are played by actors from across the pond. Even the guy from The Walking Dead is British (that one’s a surprise, isn’t it?). I, for one, blame the Beatles. But since I am not one to hold a grudge, even though I haven’t forgotten about the war of 1812 (they burned the White House, for Pete’s sake!), I am going to dive head first into the UK invasion and happily pay homage to one of the most unexpected action heroes of all time: Liam Neeson. So let’s put the Adele album I just bought on repeat, and count down the top 5 reason why Liam Neeson is the coolest action star on the planet (we could of had it all, rolling in the deep).
#5: He fought off a pack of wolves with broken beer bottles tied to his hands (The Grey):
Liam Neeson can at times inspire extreme reactions. Either you love his movies and think they are great, or you hate his movies and think they are ridiculous. Sometimes the same reason can inspire both emotions. My brother mentioned to me that when he told his girlfriend he wanted to watch the Grey, her reaction was ‘I don’t want to watch that movie, he fights wolves with broken beer bottles tied to his hands’ and his response was, ‘that’s exactly the reason why I want to watch it’.
All I can say is who hasn’t wondered if they could fight off a wolf- I know I think about that all the time! Even when I walk the streets I am always sizing up stray dogs wondering if I could take them in a fight. I am not even counting the fact that he also figured out a way to reuse broken beer bottles-the man cares about the environment.
#4: He trained Batman and Obi-Wan Kenobi (Batman Begins and Star Wars: Phantom Menace):
Liam Neeson may be the greatest agent of destruction of all time. He trained Batman and Obi-Wan Kenobi. That notch on his resume alone is enough to put him in the action hero hall of fame right along side Schwarzenegger and Stallone. He was also the only thing remotely watchable in the Phantom Menace. I know I shouldn’t mention it, but I cried when Darth Maul kills him…. spoiler alert (I almost forgot).
The best moments from Batman begins are the training scenes early in the film, when Ra’s Al Ghul teaches Bruce Wayne how to become ‘more then just a man, and devote him self to an ideal’. It’s also a testament to Neeson’s acting abilities that he stopped Katie Holmes from single handedly derailing that movie (oh what happened to you Joey, you had so much promise back in Capeside).
#3: He’s a hopeless romantic (Love Actually)
I have to confess; I’ve only seen this movie once and do not really remember a thing about it. My wife made me watch it during the first two years of our relationship, the period where guys have to watch every romantic comedy their girlfriends choose. I only include it because I like to think of Liam Neeson having a romantic side. The thought of it helps me get through the night when my wife forces me to watch Glee. I also include it because pointing out that he was in a romantic comedy might get my wife to let me watch more Liam Neeson movies.
Honorable mentions : We still have two more reasons to go and Liam Neeson is already the coolest actor in the world based on this list. Here are some other things that didn’t make the cut: He was the Lion in the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe. He was Schindler from Schindler’s List. He was an assassin in Unknown. He fights aliens in his new movie Battleship and he was Hannibal in the A-Team remake.
#2: He released the kraken (Clash of the Titans):
The moment Zeus says ‘release the Kraken’ in Clash of the Titans is one of the coolest moments in cinematic history- it rivals The Terminator’s “I’ll be back” and John McClane’s “Yippy ki ay’ line in Die Hard. There is only one man that could play Zeus and then play a lion in a children’s movie 2 month later, and that man is Liam Neeson (well, maybe Samuel L. Jackson could too).
The ‘release the Kraken’ line was the whole reason I went to go see Clash of the Titans. But man was the 3D in that movie horrible. Actually the 3D in almost every movie is horrible, it never adds anything to the movie going experience and is more of a burden than a joy. But the idea of 3D gets me every time, and even though I know I’m going to hate it, I continue to fork out the extra five bucks hoping that I will be astonished (it hasn’t happened yet)
#1: He singled handedly brought down a European sex slave operation while saving his daughter who used to be on lost (Taken):
This movie was on TNT a few weeks ago, and even though I had my whole day planned out with errands to run, I couldn’t get myself to walk away from the television. Everything about this movie is fantastic. I particularly love the scene when his daughter gets abducted and he speaks the line:
“What I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you”
The guys on the other end of that phone should have simply walked away. They had a pick of a million different daughters to a million different fathers, but what did they do, they took Liam Nesson’s daughter- big mistake! If I were to ever start abducting people, Liam Nesson’s daughter would be the last person on my list.
Starring in this movie alone makes Liam Neeson the coolest man on the planet in my book. Did you know they’re making a sequel? I know it defies all logic that Liam Neeson could get his daughter abducted all over again, but man I am pumped up for this movie. I just hope this time its in 3D.