Having a baby is definitely a life changing decision, but when you add more kids and quitting your job can really send you into a tail spin. Life really changes and it is often really hard to cope with these changes. I know most people think that it’s so great because you get to stay home. You know where you are watching TV all day and eating bon bons. But the truth is you went for being a successful working woman to an overwhelmed, tired, trying to find your sanity woman. You are not alone when you feel like you are teetering from frustration to anger and feeling that good old fashion mom guilt all at the same time. You devote you life to your kids and they are such a joy and you couldn’t imagine your life without them, but raising them is hard work. And from personal experience you are often second guessing yourself if you did the right thing. So let me tell you now you didn’t!
First thing is to know the signs if you are feeling the on-sight of depression. It is totally normal to have occasional doubt, like did I make the right decision? You may also feel envious of your friends who are single. Even feel resentment and anger are common too. However, if this is a constant feeling you are dwelling on or those feeling become very intense then that might not be so healthy. Look for the following signs:
- Feeling sad or tired most of the time
- Sleeping too much or too little
- Loss of interest in things you enjoyed
- Eating too much or too little
- Suicidal thoughts
First thing I would say is to get help, and go see your doctor. Second thing I would say is to reach out to friends or family. Find other stay-at-home moms that you can talk to. Set up play dates where the kids can play and you can have a cup of coffee and sit and talk. You won’t feel so lonely and you’ll be surprised how other moms have the same stories too. Very important that you make time for yourself! Give yourself 20 minutes each day of alone time, even if that means just going to your room and closing the door. Remember the saner version of you is always better, so don’t feel bad for giving yourself this time.
Stay-at-home moms (SAHM) suffer from depression more then what you think. Statistics say 57% of SAHM suffer from depression and those are the reported cases. Remember if you are feeling this way you are not a bad mom. We only have our kids for a few years and give them the quality and quantity of time they need and deserve. Remember that this is just a moment in your life and you will be so glad you did. Also be proud that you are a stay-at-home mom, and remember not everyone gets this opportunity.