A divorce is like an amputation, after it happens, you’re still might be the same person, but part of you is missing after it. As you may all know, I have been through one marriage and one divorce. When it happened, it shocked me to the point where I was confused why this was happening to me. When it all started out it was perfect. My spouse and I were full of energy but I guess not everything perfect can last.
Anyways, things started to go downhill and she decided that it was enough after ten years of marriage and three kids. The kids weren’t happy about it and I could sense the sadness and woe in their eyes but there was nothing that I could do about it. The yelling back and forth, the nights alone on the couch, the doors slamming, the awkward car rides result in one thing – the spark of your love is no longer igniting to keep your marriage light on.
She brought in the papers and one day, while I was working on my desk she put them down and told me she wanted a divorce. I didn’t argue because I had a feeling a couple weeks back that she was planning this. I didn’t want this but I guess if it made her happy, I wasn’t the one to object. The only thing I was worried about was the kids. She won custody of the kids and I’m only allowed to visit them occasionally.
I started to get depressed after I moved out and into to a small two bedroom apartment. I started drinking and smoking again. It was the most miserable two years of my life. I still went to my job and I was making a lot, but nothing really made me happy anymore. For the nights alone, the nights I cried myself to sleep, and to the nights I almost committed suicide, I won’t get those back.
Then, one day, I saw a light to get to the end of my tunnel. I met a girl who made me feel happy. I didn’t date her at first. I wasn’t ready for that yet. I met her at work and she welcomed me for who I was and made me feel like I still belong in this world. We were good friends for six months. Then I asked her out and she said yes. You could not imagine my ecstasy.
We have been dating now for about eight months. My health has improved and I kicked drinking and smoking. I surrounded myself with friends and I was somehow happy again. My work productivity increased, I was promoted to the executive manager of my company that I worked for, and I bought a better house.
The moral of this story is that no situation is permanent. If you were happy once, you will be happy again. Don’t let one little thing cloud your life and your judgement because everything sad DOES get better eventually. A little optimism and the quote, “It’s not the end of the world,” goes very far Trust me.