Whose turn is it to throw away the pumpkin? Come on. It is not hard to throw away the pumpkin. But in our family, we would let it sit on the porch and happily mold away. When it was nothing but slimy, droopy orange skin, my mother would finally command us to throw it away. Instead we had a pumpkin fight and tried to hit each other with pieces of decaying pumpkin.
Hide the candy from Daddy: My dad was a chocolate fiend. He could sniff out chocolate 100 miles away. Oh,we tried, we hid chocolate in our sock drawers, under the couch, even in the dishwasher one time, which was not such a good idea. But he would track it down.
Line the eyes up: There is a classic Peanuts cartoon, where Charlie Brown cannot line the eyes up in his sheet. So he walks around all Halloween in a sheet with a dozen eye holes. I feel sorry for Charlie Brown as I can take a pair of scissors and a sheet and it looks like a drunken sailor happily cut holes all over the sheet.
Just one more year: Trick-or-treating is one of the joys of childhood. So we all try to sneak in that extra year of trick-or-treating. But when I tripped over steps because my bi-focals kept fogging up, I knew it was time to quit trick-or-treating.
Guessing the beginning of the Halloween season: It is hard to guess the beginning of the Halloween Season with Halloween costumes and decorations popping up in stores right after Labor Day. But I maintain that the Halloween season begins the first day you hear “The Monster Mash” on the radio.
The Candy Corn Game: Frankly I believe that the whole purpose of Halloween is to eat as much candy corn as possible. But prices vary widely on a bag of candy corn. I saw the same size bag selling for four bucks in one store, two bucks in another and a buck fifty in a third store. You must maintain your dignity and not buy the first bag of candy corn you see, you must override your desire to rip that bag open and start stuffing the candy corn in your mouth. Remember it might be two dollars cheaper down the street. Oh hell with it! Give me candy corn NOW !
The Day after Halloween Game: Who wants to wait in line for an IPOD? There is only one thing worth camping out for, waiting for that door to open, the AFTER HALLOWEEN CANDY SALE! I often am surprised to find myself first in line, well -actually, the only one in line, when they throw open the doors on November 1, and I can rush in and buy bags of candy half price.